“You are one of a kind. I first wish to thank you for what you do; you fulfill a desire that cannot be sated anywhere else.”

"You are one of a kind. I first wish to thank you for what you do; you fulfill a desire that cannot be sated anywhere else."

Laughing

Your Personal Girlfriend: Tucking into Bed for the Perfect, Loving Ending to a Long Day

We are PERFECT for each other. You know why? Because every moment together is fun and enjoyable, we're always laughing and joking around, and I know you love me as much as I love you. It's in our every interaction, even  Read more...

Women’s Basketball Team Gangs Up to Humiliate You

Oh, yes, we ALL have it in for you! Oh, we love to tease and harass and make your life MISERABLE. We taunt you, claiming you're part of the "team," then we turn on you and point out just how pathetic you  Read more...

Your Coworker Catches a Glimpse of Your Tiny Asian Dick

I'm so sorry! I didn't even know the restroom was occupied. I swear! I ... uh... are you going to pull your pants up? Are you... why are you just standing there? Oh, did I catch you in the  Read more...

Up for another Arm Wrestling Match?

Look at you... home from the gym and trying to show off what you call "muscles." PUH-LEASE! Those aren't muscles... that's flab. I don't know why you even try. You might as well save all that money on your gym  Read more...

Your Visit to the Local Pharmacy Brings Public Humiliation

Ah, I've got you now... your full attention... and that of every stranger in line behind you. You're about to be publicly humiliated. You know why? Because you NEED my services. You need those itty bitty condoms offered by some  Read more...

My Revisit Will Leave You Wet

Look at you... still lying here in the hospital like a complete invalid. They have you all bound up in a full body cast with only your poor hands and feet to move freely! Aw... what would you do without my visits  Read more...

You Know What Your Short Stature Means, Shrimp?

Look at you! You're so... SHORT! I mean, your face is actually IN my cleavage, like your eyes are level with my boobs! Not that that wouldn't be enormously pleasant for you but... you're a man! You're supposed to be  Read more...

I’m So Sorry You’ve Been Burdened with an Inadequate Penis

Hello in there?? Your new stepmom is coming in to help you with your shower. My goodness, you take a long time! We like to save hot water around here, but I know all the rules are very new to you.  Read more...

Interviewing You for a Nude Male Model Position under Severe Scrutinization

Ahem. So, you're here for the male modeling position? Are you SURE you're up to the task? I want to first make sure you understand exactly what this opportunity will entail for you. Do you understand that you would be  Read more...

You Think I Give a Shit about Your Poverty?? I’m Worth More than You’ll Ever Be

Do you know how hilarious that is?! You want a raise?!?! An actual increase in your pay for all your hard work?! You how I waltzed into this company, why I was promoted high above you after just two years, and  Read more...